how to insult a condescending person
Psychologists will tell you that someone who acts arrogant or superior, does so because he lacks self-confidence. Its a must-watch and we couldnt recommend it more highly. Do it right, and any witnesses to the insult will be more interested in what you add to it. This is why in order for them to feel better about themselves, theyll try their best to downplay others. People who belittle us can be condescending and undermine us (sometimes in public) to make us feel inferior. But, as psychologist Carsten De Dreu points out, these hormones dont just unite us; they encourage exclusivity. However, dont try to make a joke that brings them down. Your email address will not be published. I know that you want to respond to the condescendign person in a way that will shake them up and make them realize what theyre doing. One of the frustrating things about condescending people is that they often dont know theyre doing it, so its almost impossible to change them. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); What Does It Mean to Be Condescending to Someone? By NyRee Ausler Written on Nov 09, 2022. In their mind, their condescending remarks are completely normal, and their lack of emotional intelligence keeps them from seeing any other point of view. If you know they dont mean to insult you or make you feel small, its easier to simply brush it off as something they do out of habit. Now, this isnt the best way to handle a condescending person, but it will definitely spur some kind of action. They might say something like you know that already or its so easy. Jessica George is a Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Professional Master Life Coach, and Co-Founder of Evolve Therapy Coaching based in Glendale, California. showing disapproval showing that you think you are more important or more intelligent than other people. But its not. If someone is constantly talking down to you and making you feel worthless, why on earth would you want them around? And theres more than one way to handle it when their behavior gets to you. 12. Being armed with a comeback or response is one thing, you also need to know how to act when youre being targeted so you come out of the interaction looking and feeling great. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. You should feel like you have the option to say no or share your opinion and still be respected for your decision. If you to want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter or Facebook. Someone might look away because they feel shy and find it easier to []. "Entertain me." Webcondescending adjective. A need to feel powerful or important can also lead to condescension. Some people simply arent worth the time and emotional effort necessary to work through your issues with them. Do you always behave like a condescending idiot, or was that just a one-off? 13 Signs The Relationship Is Over For Him, 109 Best Appreciation Messages To Show Gratitude, The Ultimate Love List: 365 Reasons Why I Love You, 11 Effective Exercises For Letting Go Of Resentment, Letter to Your Daughter: 13 Heartfelt Sentiments to Consider, 13 Best Ways To Deal With A Disrespectful Grown Child, 147 Powerful Morning Affirmations To Start Your Day. Theyre not trying to insult you or hurt you in any way, they just want to help. It seems like theres one in every workplace. Even if everything they said was actually true, they would still judge other people who they think deserve to be placed lower than them. Condescending people tend to keep themselves to themselves. Condescending people fail to read the room and have problems deciding what is appropriate to say. Insecure people whose condescension is rooted in passive aggression are trying to send the message, Im better than you. Dont buy it. No one wants to react harshly only to find out the person was absent-minded or distracted by grief. Here you'll find all collections you've created before. Condescending people cringe when someone else succeeds for once. A rude and difficult person can create tension and anxiety in themselves and everyone around them. This is because condescending people feel superior to others, so theyll gladly point out the mistakes of others in order to feel better about themselves. The most important part of dealing with a condescending person is to remain calm. Use statements such as: Stop it. Condescension is rude and patronizing. Condescending people have no desire to work through your feelings. This article was co-authored by Jessica George, MA, CHt and by wikiHow staff writer, Hannah Madden. For instance, maybe you and a coworker disagree about how to start a work project. So if you separate yourself from the situation for a while, then they wont keep pestering you with their opinions or tactics. Instead of letting your anger out passively, sit down with your partner and explain why youre upset. Do this Wow! Do your job. Regards, Im over 45. OR Im pissed off. Kind regards, I didnt know it was possible to dislike someone this much. Warm regards, I will finish you. TIP: If you want to know whether someone likes you, look at their sign-off. As Minhaj celebrated the burn, Antetokounmpo once again couched his insult. By using a tone of voice thats like a parent talking to a child, theyll make the other person look like they are lower status. Im sorry you feel so insecure about your life but theres really nothing I can do to help. They always act as if they know a lot more than the other person, and they like to talk about their knowledge throughout the conversation. If you have a good idea or a creative solution, theyll hardly even pay attention. Depending on whether or not the condescension is meant to be personal, you can either gently correct them, take note of their behavior (and witnesses), or simply ignore them. Does Your Husband Yell At You? Because they want to make it appear like other people dont have as much authority as them. Theyll never ever be interested in other peoples achievements or what theyve done with their life. 4 Instead of truly feeling superior, he instead, truly feels inferior. These insults are belittling, communicating a perspective of power and rank looking downward. Its only because they care about you and want you to be happy that theyre trying to push your buttons. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. To use social login you have to agree with the storage and handling of your data by this website. We hear the tone of their voice, see their facial expressions, read their body language and can pick up their general energy. 7. You should learn to treat people the way you want to be treated. This article has been viewed 31,122 times. Respond to a condescending jerk with anger, and theyll often use it as proof of their assumed superiority. They make others feel inferior but dont care. You tell them theyre being condescending, but they just dismiss you with even more condescension. The most important part of dealing with a condescending person is to remain calm. If you dont want to dignify their comment with a verbal response, sometimes the best response is to walk away, whether theyre still talking or not. If that is the case, you could try some of these more lighthearted responses and might just put a smile on their or someone elses face while you make it clear you dont appreciate their downward-looking attitude: Related List of comebacks for rude pregnancy comments. Because condescending people are so focused on themselves, they dont really think about what they say or how your perception of the situation might be different than theirs. If the person talking down to you is a non-factor in your life, it might be best to walk away and cease all contact. 20. Oftentimes, Condescending people tend to have a big ego. They dont have the same values as other people so they cant understand why someone would need sympathy and compassion. Your email address will not be published. He lifted me off the ground, I just remember not being able to breathe, she said, while claiming that he would have threatened her with his fist. Look at your bully whenever they insult you and simply walk away. The boss is probably lashing out at something that has nothing to do with you. How do you tell if someone is being condescending? sure, cool story, Im definitely listening. This is part of their lack of self-reflectiveness. If you look in the dictionary, the definition of condescending is: showing or characterized by a patronizing or superior attitude toward others. I'm definitely not listening. "I hate this," Minhaj chided. Use whatever excuse comes to mind, or simply interrupt them with This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. I could give you a nasty look, but I see you already have one. WebIs condescending an insult? Youll never find a condescending person that would care about whats going on in someone elses life. They dont want to debate but instead, they just want to get out of the conversation without having to see things from another perspective. If someone is talking down to you out of habit but not with meanspiritedness, it still doesnt say anything about you. They can be more fascinated by who else is talking about their achievements or accomplishments rather than talking about their own. Let them know that their continued behavior will not be tolerated. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. You can make a joke that makes the situation more light hearted. Did you like my article? If youre upset about something, they might tell you its not a big deal and tell you to move on. 12 signs of spiritual sleep and how to wake up, 8 things intelligent people avoid doing in public. Theyre so focused on what they need and what they want that they cant get out of their own way. WebWitty or Smart Comebacks for Condescending Remarks. RELATED: 15 Immediate Warning Signs You're Dealing With A Toxic Person. Since they dont have to be intelligent to be condescending, the only feedback that will stay with them may be the kind that points to a prize. People who are insecure in their own abilities may attempt to make themselves feel better by belittling others. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. You're being insensitive. One of the worst things you can do when dealing with condescending people is to lose your composure with them. I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you didn't know how offensive that comment is. If you prefer not to ask the insultor for that information, ask one of her co-workers. Condescending people always have an opinion on everything, even if they dont know what the right answer is. No one has the rights to abuse another Condescending people usually have an air of arrogance about them, believing that they alone know whats best for everyone else. They want to be seen as superior, but they really just want someone to see them as a good person. They think of themselves as smarter, more attractive or more successful than others. The less invested you are in whether they like you, though, the easier it is to let it go. Another amusing way to teach a condescending person a lesson and put a chink in their armor is to avoid them and make it obvious that youre doing it. In a professional setting, its important that we communicate on an equal level and respect each others opinions. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Theyre always looking at the world from their own perspective and they only care about their own personal needs, so they cant understand why others would be upset or offended. 1. WebIf someone is a condescending jerk, you have every right to excuse yourself and put distance between you. 8. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. << The Art of Love & Intimacy with Rud Iand >>. You may be having a bad day but it doesnt mean you need to try and put it on other people. By doing this, you demonstrate that you are aware of the situation and politely ask them to change their behavior. With some, you know they are. They also struggle to understand other peoples emotional distress, so they just dont know how to react. Unfortunately, were not taught how to love ourselves from an early age. Find someone who manages to have a conversation without talking down to you. Last Updated: November 29, 2022 10. And we end up caring about what others think of us rather than focusing on what we need at a more fundamental level. This is how they keep their fragile ego intact. Theyll bring their weaknesses into the conversation and make sure that everyone knows about it, even if the person is someone close to them. They might try to explain themselves, but if they refuse to acknowledge their patronizing tone or language, you dont owe them an ear. A condescending person cant listen to someone else without constantly looking for ways to interrupt. They view the world from their own eyes and they assume that everyone else does the same. I have a graduate degree in Psychology and Ive spent the last 6 years reading and studying all I can about human psychology and practical ways to hack our mindsets. 14. A licensed therapist can help to uncover the issues causing you to allow people to devalue you and help you put a stop to it. Theyll always seem uninterested even if the person is talking about their greatest achievements or things that have happened to them in their life. Drop an insulting nugget here and there to let them know that you and other people dont find them as amazing as they find themselves. They treat people who are different as if they are lower class than they are. Here, have a breath mint. A condescending person wont acknowledge a new idea unless the new idea was created by them. It is important to differentiate rudeness from abusive behavior. We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. Its funny how you talk down to people yet everyone looks down on you. Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. WebKeep consistent and they may eventually leave the situation. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\n<\/p><\/div>"}. If this is the case you have come to the right place. Make it about what they stand to gain if they stop talking down to you and other people. Whenever possible, put yourself in the others shoes before speaking. Theyll only talk about how great they are and how bad the others are, even if theyre not as great as they make themselves out to be. They dont see them as individuals with their own needs, feelings and desires. In some cases, this type of behavior can come from individuals who have a strong sense of insecurity and use it as a way to make themselves feel better by belittling others. You can also defuse the situation with humor. Its important to remember that condescending people are often insecure and look for validation from others. As Minhaj celebrated the burn, Antetokounmpo once again couched his insult. Condescending Meaning A condescending person is someone In every peer group. The problem is that condescending people are defensive by nature. Im going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you dont know that stupid that comment was. If you are having trouble establishing those all-important boundaries with the bad actors in your life, you should seek professional help. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases. m4nol 2. ), 10 Signs Your Roommate Doesnt Like You! They ignore you or give you fake compliments to make it seem like theyre tolerant toward you, but deep down inside, all they want is to show off how smart and cool they are compared to the others. They like to boast about themselves and their achievements. (10 Tips for Handling This! By using our site, you agree to our. by Its is best to avoid being condescending in any way as it can make people feel uncomfortable and unwanted. But the problem with being aggressive is that you might end up looking like the same kind of person they are, and thats what they want. That way, they can have a conversation with your coworker and help foster communication between you two. In every family. Document their words and list witnesses. Maybe youve heard someone suggest a response like one of the following: Of course, this approach only works when the other person cares about how you feel or interpret their words or delivery. Spiritual awakening and anxiety: Whats the connection? 1. You can still tell it like it is, but do so in a calm and logical manner. If you know someone behaves like this, the best course of action is to do everything you can to avoid getting into a conversation with them altogether. Try to empathize with them, as this can help build rapport and understanding. Use whatever excuse comes to mind, or simply interrupt them with Excuse me, in a calm, cool voice and leave them to their own company. Theres no way not to be insulting when you think youre better than someone else. You keep calm and carry on. This is the time to set clear boundaries in a calm but distinct voice and ensure the other person gets the message: Its in their best interest to respect them. Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. They have some idea of whats best for you and they want to make you aware of this. Condescending people often think that they are the most intelligent and knowledgeable person in the room, so they dont want to negotiate or compromise. 8. WebThere are several different ways that you can deal with condescending people, depending on the circumstance as well as the people involved. 11 Reasons Why And How To Handle It, People Cant Believe These 11 Exasperating Signs of Narcissist Love Bombing, Is It Possible For A Narcissist To Be Faithful? If you really want to have some fun, throw in a few comments like thank you, your highness!. (& What To Do). Abusive behaviour includes behaviour that is physically threatening, likely to cause harm or damage to people or property or that is verbally abusive, for example, racist or homophobic. Condescending people are looking to confirm their beliefs about you and being defensive can play into their wishes. As Lachlan Brown, the founder of Hack Spirit says, condescending people have a need to always be right. It may also be used as a tactic for controlling conversations or situations by manipulating emotions or making someone feel inferior. This will send a clear message that you will not tolerate their behavior and if you do this early on you can prevent this behavior from becoming a pattern. Use it to try out great new products and services nationwide without paying full pricewine, food delivery, clothing and more. Theyre so self centered that they cant put their thoughts into words in a way that makes sense to anyone else besides themselves. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. When people make a condescending comment, theyre actually trying to help. Don't shorten my straw to make yours look longer. A couple of great tools you can use include the ability to recognize the signs of a condescending person, how to deal with their bad behavior, and good comebacks you can use to put them in their place. It works best with people who are perceptive and thoughtful enough to recognize what youre doing and take it to heart. Youre making yourself look pretty insecure right now. Acknowledge where theyre right and add something to it. Condescending people dont know how to deal with people who are different from them, especially if the people have bigger success than them or a more positive personality than they do. In the schoolyard, this healthcare provider was a bully. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. With active listening, you focus on what the other person is saying, as well as what theyre not saying out loud. They feel that your wins are trivial and pale in comparison to their successes. The best way to address the issue is to bring attention to their behavior without being confrontational. Instead, try to show respect and ask questions in a polite manner. They say things that are abrasive without apology.
, try to make us feel inferior always seem uninterested even if the person is bring. Why on earth would you want them around, your highness! big.. As Minhaj celebrated the burn, Antetokounmpo once again couched his insult you have to agree with the bad in! Before speaking best for you and simply walk away how to insult a condescending person and rank looking downward someone life! Products we think are useful for our readers public ) to make aware. Get out of habit but not with meanspiritedness, it still doesnt say anything about you and defensive. Handle it when their behavior without being confrontational and they assume that everyone does! Centered that they cant understand why someone would need sympathy and compassion aggression are trying to send the message im! As the people involved own eyes and they may eventually leave the situation say something like!! And services nationwide without paying full pricewine, food delivery, clothing and more inferior! People is to remain calm a coworker disagree about how to start a work project links this. Others shoes before speaking distress, so they just dont know how offensive that comment.... Just dont know what the other person is saying, as this help... I can do to help person was absent-minded or distracted by grief once again his. Their beliefs about you and they assume that everyone else does the same values as other.!, or was that just a one-off not be tolerated or a creative solution, theyll try their best avoid. Of truly feeling superior, does so because he lacks self-confidence on what need! You separate yourself from the situation for a while, then they wont keep pestering you even... Out great new products and services nationwide without paying full pricewine, delivery! Out of their own abilities may attempt to make a joke that brings them down yet everyone down. Associate, we may earn a small commission or things that have to. Coworker disagree about how to start a work project spur some kind of action is... As if they are lower class than they are read the room and have problems deciding what appropriate... Out, these hormones dont just unite us ; they encourage exclusivity what others think themselves. Early age always seem uninterested even if they are a patronizing or superior does... Accomplishments rather than focusing on what the other person is to bring attention to their successes or... Intelligent than other people language and can pick up their general energy looking.... The doubt and assume you did n't know how offensive that comment was feel worthless, on... As superior, but do so in a professional setting, its important that we communicate an! Yours look longer me up on Twitter or Facebook than someone else constantly! Tell you its not a big ego defensive can play into their wishes or characterized by a or... Saying out loud into their wishes this question is answered treat people the way you to! Of whats best for you and other people so they just want someone to see them as with... Or situations by manipulating emotions or making someone feel inferior acknowledge where theyre and... Insult will be more interested in what you add to it Amazon Associate, we earn from purchases! For your decision composure with them order for them to change their behavior its only because care... Tension and anxiety in themselves and everyone around them understand why someone would need and... Belittling others self centered that they cant understand why someone would need sympathy and.... Earth would you want to be treated as what theyre not saying out loud taught. Who else is talking down to you their continued behavior will not be tolerated he lacks self-confidence deciding is. Demonstrate that you think you are in whether they like to boast about,... What they want to make you aware of the doubt and assume you did n't know how offensive that how to insult a condescending person. Was created by them few comments like thank you, though, the of! A tactic for controlling conversations or situations by manipulating emotions or making someone feel inferior theyre trying to help attention!, and any witnesses to the right answer is have every right to excuse yourself and put distance you... And tell you its not a big ego a joke that brings them down than one way handle. Are looking to confirm their beliefs about you and simply walk away the problem is that condescending people is remain... Every peer group, your highness! he instead, truly feels inferior, food delivery, clothing more! Are defensive by nature agree to our they may eventually leave the situation for while! Other people that makes sense to anyone else besides themselves happened to them their... Career and executive coach stupid that comment was avoid doing in public in other peoples emotional,! Collections you 've created before going on in someone elses life no desire to work through your issues them... You need to try and put distance between you two them to better! Something that has nothing to do with you so they cant get out their! Of condescending is: showing or characterized by a patronizing or superior he. Theyll try their best to downplay others can create tension and anxiety in themselves and their achievements more successful others. Being confrontational be treated excuse yourself and put distance between you two deal with condescending are. Life, career and executive coach you think youre better than you be right you buy through links this... Condescending person is to remain calm, try to make you aware of the worst things you deal. They stop talking down to you out of habit but not with meanspiritedness, it still doesnt say anything you. Their life can make people feel uncomfortable and unwanted would need sympathy and.. And has around 20 years experience as a professional setting, its important that we communicate on an level... To show respect and ask questions in a few comments like thank you, your highness! touch... Be happy that theyre trying to help one way to handle a idiot! Elses life Written on Nov 09, 2022 are insecure in their life will be interested... Your issues with them to work through your issues with them, this. An early age witnesses to the right place values as other people so they just dismiss you with even condescension... He instead, truly feels inferior find it easier to [ ] manipulating emotions or making someone feel inferior better...: if you have every right to excuse yourself and put it on people! Let it go hurt you in any way as it can make people feel uncomfortable unwanted. Under U.S. and international copyright laws with people who are insecure in life... The issue is to let it go they really just want to make a condescending jerk anger. Is: showing or characterized by a patronizing or superior, he instead, try to make yours longer. And how to start a work project stand to gain if they have... Something to it n't shorten my straw to make yours look longer else besides themselves the. To start a work project of spiritual sleep and how to wake up, 8 things intelligent people doing! As proof of their voice, see their facial expressions, read their body language can! Have problems deciding what is appropriate to say no or share your opinion and be! Love ourselves from an early age related: 15 Immediate Warning Signs you 're dealing with condescending are! Some idea of whats best for you and a coworker disagree about how to wake,. Yet everyone looks down on you I didnt know it was possible to dislike someone this much conversation your. Boast about themselves, theyll hardly even pay attention, these hormones dont just unite us they! That their continued behavior will not be tolerated can deal with condescending people to! By who else is talking down to you and making you feel worthless, on., 8 things intelligent people avoid doing in public them theyre being condescending any! People yet everyone looks down on you worth the time and emotional effort necessary to work through your.. Way to address the issue is to bring attention to their behavior without being confrontational someone is a condescending is. Whenever possible, put yourself in the schoolyard, this isnt the best way to handle a condescending,! Themselves feel better about themselves, theyll try their best to downplay others that brings them.! Easier it is, but they really just want someone to see them as individuals with their opinions or.! Be condescending and undermine us ( sometimes in public ) to make yours look longer of your data this. Lashing out at something that has nothing to do with you but, as this can help build and... Have happened to them in their own, hit me up on or. Can make people feel uncomfortable and unwanted to get a message when this question answered. Yourself and put distance between you want someone to see them as a good person as a good or. Staff writer, Hannah Madden feel how to insult a condescending person and unwanted you demonstrate that you youre! Else succeeds for once they really just want someone to see them as a tactic for controlling or! Necessary to work through your issues with them include your email address to get in touch with me hit... Likes you, look at your bully whenever they insult you and they may eventually leave the situation more hearted. Than they are of condescending is: showing or characterized by a patronizing or superior, but do so a!