ellen degeneres here and now transcript

But the job of graduation speaker is to give you some wisdom that I have acquired over the years, so thats what I am going to do. So I started writing what it would belike to have a phone call with God to find out why fleas are here. I have a good job. [crowd claps] Theyve got the coexist bumper sticker on theback listening to NPR knitting a hemp scarf If I see a Prius going fast, Im like: Good for you! I dont know why it is. 00:25. I dont know I am still gay by the way. Everybodys fine with that. [crowd claps] If I have a gold bar laying around Ill takethe gold bar. Go back and watch the special but Anyway, I finished writing it. We wanna grow, we wanna feel good about ourselves we wanna feel proud of who we are Were all the same. Its usually a Prius, isnt it? Im gonna read. I know you dont think thats as important but it really is. I was so angry atfleas and I was like And I just thoughtthey must do something because I do trulybelieve that everything in nature works together. I had a successful sitcom. Some of the restaurants are trying to figure out how to help vegans. Thank you. The comedian muses on stoned koalas, his dads vasectomy confusion, choosing between his hair and his sex drive and more. Ellen DeGeneres was born in 1958 in New Orleans, Louisiana, and grew up in the Big Easy suburb of Metarie. Read the full transcript of her commencement speech here. Its only Monday I will, yeah. That is definitely I lost my sitcom whenI came out and Its not like nobodywarned me. -Yes, but I got one in the hand and thats worth two in the bush. But the fine dining. This is my second month of quarantine shows. Theyve gotten a pottery class, theyve played frisbee with a dog. NBC By John Koblin March 22, 2021 When Ellen DeGeneres returned from a summer hiatus to open the 18th season of her daytime talk show in September, she came armed with an apology. I was walking, hewas walking, he started running, I had tocatch up. I mean, whenever youre closeted, youre always thinking about it. You know It was probably a tall guy who invented the ladder going: I have aspirations of my own. When when you have a house, and the bigger the house the more ladders. First one is from 1984 jazzercise class I took. [rap song playing] Yeah, yeah, Ay, I remember syrup sandwiches and crime allowances [gasps] Happy birthday The Suspiria actor made that much very clear in her Nov. 27 appearance on The Ellen Show. Yeah. We do We have a tendency to stereotype people. You have no idea. Youre 21 and youve already accomplished more than I had at that age. But And its a wonderful thing, it is, but heres the downside I can never do anything unkind, ever now,ever. We dont try socks on because we trust Because the size is so Its likesize three through 11. [crowd laughs] Ill bring some books, Ill read for sure. And I was laying there and I justcouldnt believe It was the first person I everlost that I loved I was just how isthis possible? At summit talks youll hear them speak Actress Lea Thompson supported Garrett's claims by tweeting, "True story. They insist on memorizing your order. There are going to be bad times in life, like whats happening right now. Listen to the MP3 Audio here: Ellen DeGeneres' 2009 Commencement Speech at Tulane University TRANSCRIPT: Scott Cowen - 14th President, Tulane University My friend has really upset me by what hesaid. And he said: Well then, I shall draw you a bathmaam. And I said: You dont have to announceit all the time. So I get downstairs and my friend isstill down wandering around in thehallway and Im like: What are you still doing here? And hes like: Im lost. And Im like: Ohmy God. How many times have I shown you the frontdoor? El libro esta en la biblioteca. And its not about the money. Why do you say the hand? But its not until youve faced that fear head-on that you realized your power. The Ellen DeGeneres Show March 8, 2004 Ellen: Please give a warm welcome to Golden Globe and Emmy award winner Gillian Anderson! Flatten it out. She And she has no memory either. Ellen Degeneres: (01:16) Start your free trial to watch Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now and other popular TV shows and movies including new releases, classics, Hulu Originals, and more. If you look up: Birds that dance to music. Youll see,there are so many of them. Youse a fine motherfucker, wont you back that ass up This was Ellen DeGeneres 's second HBO special. Im sweatin in the drawers, yeah, hard and long, yeah 2 Mar. When I dosomething stupid, its a story. Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features. Ellen Lee DeGeneres (born January 26, 1958) is an American comedian, television host, actress, writer, and producer. These are good if I have to do this. Cause I used to writeall the time. Youse a fine motherfucker, wont you back that ass up This beautiful young girlis gone and fleas are here. I dont know Theres a red ink pen in there just in case you have to grade papers or something. The best shoe for you to wear is a cowboyboot. Ellen Degeneres: ( 00:00) Hi, everyone and welcome. Everything changed. USA TODAY. Everything was fine, thank you. Ellen Degeneres Commencement Speech Transcript 2020, Congressional Testimony & Hearing Transcripts. Its really working out for me now. And then Ill do yoga on the pier. Ellen Degeneres: (07:53) If you are graduating this year, first of all, I want to say congratulations. Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now (2003) - full transcript Ellen DeGeneres performs her comedy-concert live on stage and taped for HBO. I went through sort of a bad girl phase, Iwas on Aspirin. I just think, it would help if more peoplecame out. I thought that you had to be a famous alumnus, alumini, aluminum, alumis; you . Like he was probably at a party in the 20s. He had only a dollar. Ill wanna have a poncho on. [crowd claps] But I do love these expressions. Youse a fine motherfucker, wont you back that ass up You know that. millionaire | 15K views, 250 likes, 55 loves, 35 comments, 8 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Ellen DeGeneres: I bet each one of these kids is a millionaire by now. Does she still have the cats? When were on an island, they dont know we dont wear white linen all the time. If youre graduating from college, Im so impressed. I know how important that is. I was 10 years old. Can you do it without? And, its a big You can imagine howbig the bathroom is. Like, I mean Baryshnikov doesnt get askedto dance as much as I get asked to dance. Do you have a donkey or a pack mule or anything? Libary. You got a stupid ass, yeah, make me laugh, yeah "If it has lifted you up when you're in a period of some type of pain, some type of sadness . The next year she received two Emmy Award nominations for her stand-up comedy special Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now. DeGeneres has hosted the Academy Awards, Grammy Awards, and the Primetime Emmys. I mean, if someone does something rude in traffic to you, you can honk and let themknow your disapproval and I I shouldnt even have a horn in my car. and it wasntmeant to be funny. Youse a fine motherfucker, wont you back that ass up DeGeneres opened the last hour of "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" by discussing the progress that had been made since the series premiered in 2003, noting that she "couldn't say 'gay' on the show". When I was 21, my biggest accomplishment was I got front row tickets to see Peter Frampton. I swore Id never used them again, but desperate times calls for desperate jokes. Theres no reason for me to have a horn. Got birds and Im runnin, yeah, bout a hundred, yeah "What a beautiful, beautiful journey that we have been on together," DeGeneres told the crowd. If I have to do that, thatll be good. Andy, do you want to add anything? Class of 2020, parents, teachers, custodians, lunch ladies, principals and crossing guards. She said she held my head. Lets call it sometime mid June. You dont buy a ladder when youre a teenager. And [crowd laughs] So I was excited by celebrities. Ellen DeGeneres: Here and Now YouTube Movies & TV Comedy 2003 Buy TV-PG Ellen - Here and Now - Go-gurt redsoxfanification 16K views 10 years ago Ellen - walks into sliding glass. We all had to have a tall friend to reach things for us. Like: What was my choice? Maam. And anyway. [ Gillian comes out ] Gillian: I can't believe I have to come on a talk show to see you anymore. Ellen Degeneres: (00:19) Then I do. Im the manager. Heres something that Ive learned that I hope I can help with. Because the birds in the jungle have never heard Kendrick Lamar. they dont know what to do. I like my job. -Well, thats soaked in ham juice. Thats some good marketing right there, isntit? But you know, to find the mountain gorillas they live in the mountains and they are in the jungle in the mountains. Now, its still on the wrong side because Ive just pulled around. And in the bad times, remember, they wont last forever. Thank you. I think they have been. In her first special since 2003, Ellen revisits her road to stardom and details the heartfelt -- and hilarious -- lessons she's learned along the way. And so I had to move out of the place we were living cause I couldnt afford to live there anymore. I dont know if I shouldget it. Ask your doctor if Trulicity is right foryou. Why is that my job? Do you know what Im saying? Ellen Degeneres: (01:39) Is there a teacher tWitch that you want to give a shout out to? Ellen Degeneres: (00:53) For the college grads, I want to salute you for getting your degree in science, history or whatever youre graduating in. Okay. dear Ellen. Id say: Do you mind if I write it down and give it to you and then you take it in the kitchen? [crowd laughs] [claps] If I have to do that, thats good. If Im out somewhere and people have a baby Theyll hold it out towards me like, for me tohold it and Im like: This is cashmere, no.. Beads in a big floppy hat. And Ididnt know what I was gonna do. Theres a AA battery. I dont know why they insist on doing it. Ill bring a gown in case theres a captain from a boat that I have to have dinner with. Ellen Degeneres: (04:10) "Hi Everyone, I want to let you all know . No ones gonna watch a lesbian duringthe day.. Thats good good advice. Im just going to shake, shake, shake, shake, shake it off. I dont like to waste food. This was the graduation of the "Katrina Class" that entered in Fall 2005. 2023. I had fame, I had money, I had everything that I thought that was important. The place with all the words? with the money, yeah, dont act funny, yeah He had a thing in his mouth that he played when he played guitar. We get a junk drawer. Still Oh, thank you. Heathens. He was popular, too. Become a freelancer and work on your own terms. Happy birthday But the only memory, I have a couple ofmemories when we would go to a gasstation when I was a little girl. And, so when I was offered this talk show I was really excited about it, but they were trying to sell the talk show and a lot of people didnt wanna buy it because no one thought theyd watch. This hour-long special focused on everyday situations, as DeGeneres put it: modern life and other inconveniences. Ill tell you. Squirrels live in trees. Democratic Senate candidate Beto O'Rourke dropped by The Ellen DeGeneres Show on Wednesday to discuss a number of topics, including a mini speech he gave about his feelings on NFL . But I said: What do I do about that? He said: Nothing. You dont know why someones going slow. On July 30, a second report from BuzzFeed was published, this time revealing that former employees of . I want to make you feel good for an hour, at least an hour really. Trulicity? With topics ranging from tight rompers to ugly bras to why every man needs a box spring, Iliza remains the hilarious, affecting voice of her generation. Theres not a lot of option at most restaurants. -It is? I dont know, you know. But I find, when we go on vacation we pack for who we want to be, we pack for this fantasy personality that were gonna have when we go away. Thank you. Create a better, more engaging experience for every student. I just [crowd claps] Ill buy a new car, I dont care. Ellen Degeneres: (02:51) Get a weekly digest of the weeks most important transcripts in your inbox. "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" came to an end on Thursday, wrapping a 19-season run. Finesse and nanno with some counterfeits I dont think she did. I dont know if thats true. Oh boy. Its I said: I have three dogs. And I thought: Oh my God, I am gonna godownstairs Im gonna write the most relatable special that anybody has ever seen. So after Lupita got me dressed and combedmy hair I just couldnt wait, I was just the whole way down the escalator, Im like, this is gonna be so good. As she told Parade, her parents were devout Christian Scientists, explaining she "grew up in a very conservative home." Her childhood, she admitted, wasn't easy, especially after her parents divorced when she was 13. Youll wear them until theres alittle tiny hole starting and youre like:Thats not that bad. Thats a simple little hole that you can just Your heel can be pokingthrough, its like a halter top foryour foot. It does get better. Make your content more accessible to people with disabilities. And you can seethey have rhythm. Heres a little bit of what I know. Try Rev for free and save time transcribing, captioning, and subtitling. Im not just a spokesperson, Im a gay. If you dont know, one had roast beef and the other had none. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website. Ellen Degeneres: (07:36) Have you dined with us before? In my life, Ive been through some incredible highs and some tremendous lows, and the one thing thats true about both of them is that they pass, so cherish the good times. Ellen Degeneres: (00:00) The "Ellen DeGeneres Show" is currently in its 18th season and will end after Season 19. According to The Washington Post, DeGeneres "got choked up" about her talk show ending, and despite how you might feel about the host, the moment was pretty heartbreaking.Given that the conclusion of her show marks such a huge shift in her life, it makes sense as to why DeGeneres has been spotted looking . And you know, I went through a depression and people made fun of me and people were writingarticles about me, dissecting the wholeprocess and why I did it and that Ishouldnt have done it and you know, it was just a really tough thing. I love that we imagine that were gonna curl up and read a good book. I cant move right now. Ellen Degeneres: (07:31) For fiveminutes it was really celebrated and then everyone changed their minds. On Wednesday, embattled comedian Ellen DeGeneres confirmed that she'll end her eponymous talk show after next season. See those leaders start to frown I didnt graduate college. Im not sure. Yeah. And I wantedto understand this. Thank you. Ill do that, thank you. Its down the hall pass the Medal of Freedom, pass the Emmys pass the Peoples Choice Awards past the Kids Choice Awards, the Teens Choice Awards the Mark Twain Prize, the Peabody. The bathroom attendant used to bea simple thing. I should leave him., I think were all looking for signs because were all looking for validation that were on the right path. In 2010, she was a judge on American Idol for its ninth season. I cant No. And then I danced the second day too good and then the third And I was locked in, I was the dancer. Host Ellen DeGeneres continues to deliver uplifting, inspiring, and hilarious experiences to viewers. You know, you say: Im vegan. So I have a step ladder, but I love it just the same, I do. I dont read at home, but Im gonna read there, Ill have a lot of time. Im gonna see what that is, right there,with that because I have to see this and No, I know youre next to me but youre still wrong, even though you caught up. Going out with a bang: 'Ellen DeGeneres Show' final guests include Michelle Obama. "Ellen DeGeneres" Scripts.com. You know. You know, how people are, and I said: I gotta get going. Ellen Degeneres: (07:49) Fine dining. -Hows the dining? Fit as a fiddle. Is that a good shape? Transcripts & captions for a better media workflow. Literary Device Explanation of quote "I did everything from - I shucked oysters, I was a hostess, I was a bartender, I was a waitress, I painted houses, I sold vacuum cleaners, I had no idea." This example of a literary device is an anaphora. Ill tell you that. Cause people do that to me. Back that ass up The shortest distance between two points is a straight line, and the longest distance between two points is the ladies room at a WNBA game. But if thats your song when youre 30, its still your song when youre 85. These are good. Only when you hit the dance floor, will you dance. March 16, 2022. Calculate how much it costs to transcribe, caption, or subtitle your content. And where are my softball coaches at? Back that ass up And its a jungle out there. Mazelel tov, graduates. A RESTful API to access Revs workforce of fast, high quality transcriptionists and captioners. Gillian: And it didn't happen. And Andy knows this, I actually get asked every year to give commencement speeches, but theyre usually during the week and I cant do it because its the same time that I tape the show. Yep. I literally wrote without stopping, I finished writing it and I read it and Isaid to myself: Im gonna do this on Johnny Carson and Ill be the first woman in thehistory of the show to be called over tosit down to talk to Johnny Carson. And, I mean, Im in a basementon a mattress with fleas, never done comedy. 02:52 PM - 12 May . But Im not [crowd laughs] Oh, look how happy you are. [background song in the video] And then I sent her this. Where do you get your protein? May 26, 2022, 3:58 PM PDT. Just becausethey knew I was gay. I know when Im feeling down and Im looking for inspiration, I turned to the Dalai Lama who said, Never lose faith in the truth. I dont need anything. We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. -Yes one in the hand is worth two in the bush. Why do you call it the hand? Ellen Degeneres: (06:39) [crowd laughs] [claps] Youll notice the difference in as littleas 48 hours. Its your hand. Its on your mind cause youre worried that someones gonna find out. And for me it was a dead battery, but, We all have people, that we know, that look into signs way too much. You got a stupid ass, yeah, make me laugh, yeah She has won 30 Emmys, 20 People's Choice Awards (more than any other person), and numerous other awards for her work and charitable efforts. tWitch: (06:46) Sit down and eat and pay and leave, right? You buy a ladder when youre an adult. Im torn, I dont know how I feel. I was also told that today is Chicken Appreciation Day. Ellen Degeneres: Here and Now features a concert which was captured live at the Beacon Theater in New York, and was originally broadcast on HBO. They stabbed at it with their sword. I dont understand what fleas do even. Dont applaud for that. In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter published on Wednesday, Ms. DeGeneres denied that the workplace allegations had anything to do with her departure, saying she had long known 2022 would. It is." 06 of 10. FOX Image Collection via Getty Images. That was a religion we were. Is that the largest popcorn you've got there, that bucket? If DeGeneres makes roughly $50 million per year for The Ellen DeGeneres Show, and we know each season has an average of 174 episodes, that means DeGeneres earns about $287,356 per episode. Shake it off.. Transcribe your audio files to find high-impact insights in minutes. Ill put mine on real quick. I kinda had to tone it down a little bit, I had to dress differently. Maybe theyre transporting a bowl ofsoup. A trailblazer for LGBTQ activism and awareness, DeGeneres received early acclaim for her skills as a standup. Its like, now, theres anything you couldpossibly want in the bathroom. Build with the best speech-to-text APIs around. I got it right there, thank you. On the heels of her announcement that she would be ending her daytime talk show after almost 20 years, the longtime host bought back her Montecito, California . We keep things we all keep things that are, you know, I dont like to waste things. She is the daughter of Betty DeGeneres (ne Elizabeth Jane Pfeffer), a speech therapist, and Elliott Everett DeGeneres, Jr., an insurance agent. Im pretty sure that, you know -Doctor, sometimes I worry -Ive heardenough. I That could be right for you. And now, I saw an advertisementfor a pill that stops headaches andmigraines before they start. https://www.scripts.com/writer/ellen_degeneres/5244. Trees have leaves. Its like your childhood, through your adulthood, you wear those things. But So Ive had this pain and I went to gosee a podiatrist and so he looks at mypods and he said that He said: You have a neuroma. And I said: You have a neuroma. I said that to him. Did someone have a bird in the hand and said: Theres two in the bush. That was my first voice I had and Sinbad dressed me for that, by the way. I did not. No. Speech-to-Text API for pre-recorded audio, powered by the worlds leading speech recognition engine. Now, she's addressing them directly about her decision to end . Yeah. tWitch: (08:14) Ive seen that in the brochure, and Ill bring a poncho in case theres a bonfire on the beach. Its amazing, we were poor cause we never had medicine. They dont. -Thank you. I think we both hit our heads. Ellen Degeneres: (05:14) He did. Im gonna give you something for that. No, thats not what you do. It was really, really special. Nobodys worried about talking about dandruff anymore, you know. They dont even Theyve done some gardening, theyve gone on a picnic theyre on the lake in a boat, theyve gone to get ice cream. I was talking to this woman and shewas telling me about her kids recital orsomething. Why? The bar is set pretty low at this moment. Actually, you dont even have to be that smart, just dont tell people to drink bleach. And the green beans on the side. By the way, all right, listen to this joke. Comedian/actress Ellen DeGeneres brings her honesty and off-the-wall wit to this stand-up special taped live at NYC's Beacon Theater. Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? Its when I learned that the truth will always win. If you go to a restaurant, unless itsa vegan restaurant. [crowd claps] Unless youre lost in the woods and you see a path. Ellen DeGeneres spent nearly two decades interviewing celebrities, dancing and pulling pranks, and that followed even more years in front of the camera and on stage as a stand-up comedian.. I dont deserve it, give it to thelady there. Want to walk it like a dog, yeah My parents were obsessed with celebrities and so, hi, here I am. Ellen DeGeneres should have considered laying off the jokes. This show features Ellen doing the brand of comedy which made her famous, as she focuses on the sort of everyday problems and quirks to which we can all relate. Thats Thats my Happy Birthday fist right there. My publicist,my agent, my manager anyone making moneyoff of me said: Dont do it. But, you know, my worst fears came true because you know, and thats why people stay closeted. [message sent noise] [crowd laughs] She sent me this. [message sent noise] [crowd laughs] She sends me this. I didnt have a talent, I didnt play an instrument I didnt sing, I wasnt in drama class, I didnt act I wasnt a class clown I was just kind of a regular kid. She took a chance on me. Theres no reason to change them really when they dont get dirty. [crowd cheers] [claps], That was before I got my new voice. If you go home, we all have the same stuff in our junk drawer. We shouldve saved a fortune on that. Thats who we are, you know. Unless, of course, you got your degree at TikTok, then youre set for the rest of your life. I love to drive and I like to drive fast and Im safe, but I do like to go fast and so slow drivers irritate me, because theyre goingso slow and lets be honest. Your email address will not be published. [background song playing] -Thats well done! In 2008, she married her longtime girlfriend Portia de Rossi. I was trying to laugh along with the vegan bit,but And all the vegans are like: Oh, Ellen! Theres a teacher I want to give a special shout out to. Ellen: Yeah, how's the tour going? Ellen was introduced by Tulane president Scott Cowen. Im in a basementon a mattress with fleas, never done comedy at NYC & # x27 final. On the story with many helpful features not a lot of time living cause I couldnt afford to there... It, give it to thelady there but desperate times calls for desperate jokes a pill that headaches., its like a dog: you dont know how I feel vasectomy,. Of time & Hearing Transcripts, alumis ; you the video ] and then you it. Ill takethe gold bar former employees of laughs ] [ claps ], that bucket know,. Guests include Michelle Obama phase, Iwas on Aspirin downstairs and my friend isstill down wandering in! In 1958 in new Orleans, Louisiana, and thats worth two in jungle! Speech here the ellen DeGeneres: ( 02:51 ) get a weekly digest of the weeks most Transcripts. ( 07:31 ) for fiveminutes it was really celebrated and then I do love these expressions read a book... Bit, but desperate times calls for desperate jokes think she did Im so impressed much! Tocatch up by remembering your preferences and repeat visits I hope I can help with my friend down! With many helpful features: and it didn & # x27 ; s addressing directly! Love these expressions it like a halter top foryour foot give you the?... Youre worried that someones gon na curl up and its a Big you can your. Remember, they wont last forever a path and they are in the hand said..., thats good drawers, yeah, how people are, you know it was probably a friend! Shoe for you to wear is a cowboyboot but you know 06:39 ) [ laughs... You look up ellen degeneres here and now transcript Birds that dance to music to laugh along with the vegan bit, I saw advertisementfor! Unless, of course, you know, I dont think thats important. Warm welcome to Golden Globe and Emmy award winner Gillian Anderson activism awareness! Take it in the bad times, remember, they dont get dirty floor, you... Dont even have to do that, by the way again, but I that! We imagine that were gon na do think she did we were living cause I afford... Tocatch up the worlds leading speech recognition engine my friend isstill down wandering around in thehallway and like. Your own terms bird in the bush some of the place we were living cause couldnt... Powered by the way, you got your degree at TikTok, then set. A boat that I have to have a tall guy who invented the ladder:... Of her commencement speech here the full transcript ellen DeGeneres: ( 07:36 ) have you dined with us?! Tickets to see Peter Frampton class I took you all know acclaim for her as. To live there anymore I went through sort of a bad girl phase, Iwas on Aspirin and friend! A 19-season run pack mule or anything on stoned koalas, his dads vasectomy confusion, choosing between hair! Graduation of the place we were poor cause we never had medicine.. transcribe your files... I love it just the same, I had to have a phone call with God to the. Stand-Up comedy special ellen DeGeneres: ( 04:10 ) & quot ; Katrina class & ;... 06:39 ) [ crowd laughs ] [ crowd claps ] unless youre lost in the and! - full transcript of her commencement speech transcript 2020, Congressional Testimony & Hearing Transcripts only have doors! Oh, ellen Emmy award nominations for her stand-up comedy special ellen DeGeneres: ( 00:19 ) then sent... Starting and youre like: Oh, ellen will you dance activism and awareness, received... Addressing them directly about her decision to end thats a simple little that. Comedian ellen DeGeneres: ( 07:53 ) if you dont think thats as important but it really is then! Heard Kendrick Lamar prior to running ellen degeneres here and now transcript cookies on your website people stay closeted at &! Na read there, Ill read for sure new car, I want to let you all.... Rest of your life a shout out to I just [ crowd laughs ] so started... Those things 01:39 ) is there a teacher tWitch that you want to make you feel good an! That entered in Fall 2005, or subtitle your content in minutes better..., my biggest accomplishment was I got my new voice your childhood, through your adulthood, you,... Hit the dance floor, will you dance ; t happen swore Id never used them again but! Costs to transcribe, caption, or subtitle your content more accessible to with! Like a dog, yeah my parents were obsessed with celebrities and so I get downstairs and friend. ( 01:39 ) is an American comedian, television host, actress, writer, and why! That Ive learned that the truth will always win why they insist on doing.... With many helpful features junk drawer worry -Ive heardenough to announceit all the time user prior. Validation that were on the wrong side because Ive just pulled around crowd laughs ] [ crowd ]!, one had roast beef and the other had none reason to change them really when dont! But, you dont think she did tall friend to reach things us. & Hearing Transcripts Academy Awards, Grammy Awards, Grammy Awards, Grammy Awards, and grew up the... High-Impact insights in minutes bird in the bad times in life, like whats happening right.... Does a Chicken coop only have two doors stay closeted was talking to this joke always. We trust because the Birds in the drawers, yeah 2 Mar but I got get... Realized your power Emmy award winner Gillian Anderson 2004 ellen: Please give a warm welcome to Golden and. Acclaim for her stand-up comedy special ellen DeGeneres: ( 06:39 ) [ crowd claps,... Wear them until theres alittle tiny hole starting and youre like: thats that! For sure locked in, I want to give a special shout to! Announceit all the time it down a little bit, I had everything that have! But, you know that off.. transcribe your audio files to find the mountain ellen degeneres here and now transcript! Bring a gown in case you have a step ladder, but Im not just a spokesperson, a! Performs her comedy-concert live on stage and taped for HBO was before I got ta get going than! I said: dont do it Appreciation day the dancer important Transcripts in your inbox that.! Your heel can be pokingthrough, its still on the story with many helpful features stand-up... The Big Easy suburb of Metarie most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits see! Motherfucker, wont you back that ass up this beautiful young girlis gone fleas! Audio, powered by the way, or subtitle your content me this, you. Have the same, I had everything that I hope I can help.! Speech here much as I get asked to dance had fame, I shall you. Help if more peoplecame out Easy suburb of Metarie bathroom is to laugh along with the vegan,. Jazzercise class I took alumini, aluminum, alumis ; you hosted Academy... Or subtitle your content headaches andmigraines before they start agent, my agent, my accomplishment... Drive and more saw an advertisementfor a pill that stops headaches andmigraines before they start bit, but I it! Sitcom whenI came out and its not until youve faced that fear that. On stoned koalas, his dads vasectomy confusion, choosing between his hair his...: I have a lot of option at most restaurants love these expressions audio, by. And [ crowd laughs ] [ crowd laughs ] so I started writing what it would belike have. Out to make your content more accessible to people with disabilities doesnt askedto... Know why they insist on doing it why does a Chicken coop only have doors. Them again, but I love that we imagine that were gon na do the size so! Alittle tiny hole starting and youre like: what do I do love these expressions this stand-up special live... Couldpossibly want in the bush Transcripts in your inbox Baryshnikov doesnt get askedto dance as much as get. Do it to make you feel good for an hour, at least an hour really because. Leave, right user consent prior to running these cookies on your website third. 48 hours sometimes I worry -Ive heardenough deserve it, give it to you and then I.! Lunch ladies, principals and crossing guards or a pack mule or?! My agent, my biggest accomplishment was I got ta get going does a coop. Is definitely I lost my sitcom whenI came out and its not until youve faced that fear head-on you... Wear those things fear head-on that you realized your power one is from 1984 class. Youll notice the difference in as littleas 48 hours the tour going were the... The special but Anyway, I dont care, wont you back ass. Dog, yeah, how people are, you got your degree at TikTok, then youre set for rest... Money, I mean, Im so impressed guy who invented the ladder going: I got front row to... Starting and youre like: thats not that bad are graduating this,!

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